A Secret Pleasure Hidden In Your Everyday Life; Time To Relish Your Life
Isn’t life beautiful?
There is something in this world that makes me want to live beautifully. I understood this long back that I don’t want to just exist. I don’t wake up every day to do the work I hate for a company I hate for a boss I hate just to repeat the same cycle over and over until I am 60 and someone stops me in the street and asks ‘Excuse me, I am a TikTok-er and I ask random questions to strangers. Can I ask you what’s your biggest regret in life?
And then I take a trip back in time to analyze my life just to find the answer that ‘My biggest regret is that I never lived life. I guess I just waited a long time to finally start enjoying my life…You know until I find a purpose, a good job, a great partner, a trip to Italy, and all of those things that I forgot to enjoy life as it came.’
One of my biggest fears in life is that I will die without enjoying life.
I am scared to even think that I will end up postponing ‘joy’ for the work that guarantees a bright future.
The thought of living in default mode is the one thing that scares me to death.
I don’t want to be 60 and regret the life I led. Sure, when I am 60, I will have a collection of regrets, unfulfilled wishes, and a few ‘I wish I had…’ sentences to keep me awake till morning. But I don’t want to get old just to wish to be young and live the same life but with a twist of mindfulness, and joy.
When I look at people around me, all I see is a sleeping body. Sure, their eyes are wide open, they are doing all this great work and making good money. Yet, they have a void in their eyes. It’s like they wake up every day to do the work that can give them a good future but at the cost of burning their present moment. I don’t want to be one of those people who wake up for the future.
I want to wake up to smell the sweetness of the present moment. I want to live every day and not just exist.
I want to find joy in my day-to-day to enjoy TODAY just as we find more things to do for a better future.
I know some people might say, ‘Well, Renuka, easy for you to say when your life is all set. I have to go to work to report to a boss I hate and for the company I have no interest in.’
Honestly, I get it. I have been in your shoes as well. But just because life has a few challenges doesn’t mean you will wait until everything is happy and merry to finally enjoy your life.
When I said I didn’t want to realize I lived a dead life when I was 60, I also meant that I just didn’t want to share good stories with my grandkids (if I have any). I want to have a life full of stories that taste happy-sweet-sad-bitter-exciting-mundane-glorious and depressing.
Imagine you were watching a movie, and the main character only has good-beautiful-happy-sunshine-filled days, how would you feel? You will be happy at first but you will get bored just as easily. That, my friend, is the reality of humans. We get bored easily, even with happy emotions. We seek newness. We love adventure — be it in our day-to-day life or with our emotions.
Imagine people are dying of hunger and you are sitting in the comfort of your home whilst complaining to your friend, about how boring life is these days.
No, I am not trying to make you feel bad nor am I saying you are ungrateful. All I am saying is — even if you have everything, you will get bored of it. Even if God opens the door of heaven for you, you will get bored within a few weeks maybe and then you will wish to see what hell looks like, just a quick visit.
There is a reason why people hate the same job that they studied hard for their entire lives.
WE GET BORED. We want newness.
However, as you may ask, how is it in any way related to my problem of not being able to enjoy life and looking at my boss’s face while he/she yells at me for the fifth time in a week?
The answer is — the secret to living a good life is to STOP wishing for the current situation to change into your dream scenario. Take a step back and ask yourself, ‘This is my life. It is what it is. How can I enjoy it?’
When you do that, you first free yourself from the cage of your mental scenarios that always keep you detached from your current life. You step into real life and out of that mental world. Once you can feel the connection with your real life, current life aka what is happening to you at the moment, not only do you feel more mindful of your actions and thoughts but you also feel a sense of peace — knowing you are here, not lost somewhere in the imaginary world.
For example: When I was doing my first job back in 2020, I was young and energetic. For the first few weeks, I thought my job was everything. I felt like I was doing the most important work in the entire company just to realize that I was stupid (like most young people are). The problem was I had created this imaginary world where I believed that my job was important and my work mattered. I thought that I would be in meetings, winning over the world and all the more crap that they sell you in colleges.
But the reality was nothing like that. There were hundreds of people like me, doing the same work as me. And apparently, I am just another employee who can be easily replaced. It didn’t make me hate my job but it definitely broke my dream. I felt that I was doing all this work just for…? Well for paying bills on time. My life wasn’t mine anymore. I used to wake up, have breakfast, work, get back home, have dinner and sleep. And on weekends, I just wanted to stay home to relax and watch Netflix.
So you see I was there too. But I knew one thing I cannot keep living like this or working like this. There was no life like in my day-to-day life. I wanted to feel connected to my life. I wanted to enjoy the life I was currently living. I couldn’t say to myself ‘Renuka, just work hard for a few years and when you become the boss, you can enjoy as much as you want then. These are your years of working hard and making things happen for yourself.’
From school to college, society asks you to WAIT until you have everything to ENJOY LIFE.
But I was done with waiting. I wanted to ENJOY life today and every day. So I asked myself, ‘What can I do to make my life beautiful in small ways?’
The answer was — choosing to enjoy the little pleasures of life mindfully.
How?
The Magical Time:
How do you wake up?
There is so much that we complain about, so many things that didn’t go as per our plans. YET we continue to ignore the one thing that is always in our control — the magical time.
I believe ‘How you start your day will decide the functioning of your day.’ And if you couldn’t answer my question, that means you wake up with a sleeping mind. Perhaps, you don’t have a beautiful morning routine that feels good or perhaps, you have a morning routine that goes like this:
You wake up late and curse yourself for oversleeping. Then you curse something else maybe your morning coffee for burning your tongue or that dining table that broke your toe because you were in a hurry. Then you rush to get to the office to get cursed by your boss and the rest of the day slips away from your hand. Before you know it, it’s night again and you are dumb scrolling social media even when you know that if you don’t sleep on time, you will be late. But yeah, ‘you don’t care enough.’
For the past three years, if I had been consistent with one thing — it is to relish my morning before the world starts demanding things from me.
For example: When I was doing that job, I started waking up early. From 8 AM to gradually 6 AM. That extra two hours allowed me to enjoy my life which was beyond work. I could read on the balcony or I could have written for my book. I could learn a new skill or simply do all the things I was supposed to do (taking a shower, making breakfast, or getting ready) at a slower pace. That one change allowed me so much peace, and freedom that I could feel why I wanted to become an adult — have my own routine without anyone’s opinions or judgments.
Today when I am an author and have all the freedom of time, I still make it a point to not rush my morning. To wake up at a time when I want, doing things I want without hurrying to get anywhere. I know if I wake up late every day, I will have to get back to work and manage everything whilst rushing. I hate that. So, why would I start my day with hate?
Isn’t that choice lying to you to decide how you want to wake up? Isn’t that a sweet pleasure of life to start your day as you want?
If yes, why are you ignoring this one pleasure every day?
I call ‘morning’ time ‘The Magical Hours’ because this is the only time frame where;
a) You haven’t interacted with anyone
b) You have a relatively free mind with no to-do list or stress
c) Your mind can feel the freshness of new energy
d) You are free from the expectations of the world
In your morning time, you don’t have anyone to get back to. No stress from the previous day or at least you have the choice to either start fresh or continue worrying about something that had already happened.
This is the one time of the day which allows you to BE YOU. To DO YOU. To FEEL YOUR HEART. To relish YOUR THOUGHTS/FEELINGS.
And the best part is, you are an adult so you can spend it as you like.
For example: After waking up, I quickly take a shower, get ready, pray, make a cup of coffee, and read something good. I either scroll Pinterest, read a book, or perhaps write. I don’t do Yoga nor do I clean. This is my morning and I look forward to spending it like I love. I look forward to waking up just so I can have my coffee and sit down in peace to do what I like.
Conclusion:
Now, it’s your turn to ask yourself, ‘How would you like to enjoy this little pleasure of life every day?’
You can paint or cook. You can clean your room or you can read a good book. You can do Yoga or you can meditate. You can dance or you can just BE.
Whatever it is that makes you happy, DO IT. Because how you start your day will decide the functioning of your entire day. If you start your morning by making magic happen for yourself, you will feel that warmth of magic the entire day. If you start your morning on a default mode, doing what you always do, you will only experience what I always experience.
So, my love, decide what you want.
