An Article to Read If You Have Been Doubting Humanity, Love & Kindness
I have been wondering ‘Is it good to be nice/kind in a world that only takes advantage of you?’
Everywhere you look on the internet, you’ll find all the influencers collectively repeating the same concept ‘Don’t be too kind or you will get used.’
My God!
Firstly, just pouring someone a glass of water and not having it done back for you doesn’t mean you will judge the act of kindness and compassion altogether.
I know we all come across some people in life who make us question our kindness and loving hearts. People who say good things to your face, get their work done, take all that they need, and then leave. And in such a case, you start to feel that maybe this generation isn’t worthy of your love and kindness. You feel that I helped everyone but no one helped me when I was in trouble.
But tell me something, how does it feel when people don’t show kindness to you? How does it feel when in exchange for love, you get blamed?
Surely, it feels illegal to be kind afterward.
However, ask yourself, Do you want to make someone feel the same way you were made to feel? If you can help someone, do you really want to stand there and do nothing even if that person is the one you don’t like?
If you have the power to ease someone’s pain, are you going to stand there and first analyze ‘What can this person do in exchange for me? Will this person help me back when I need it? Is he/she a good person?’
If you are going to do math while helping someone, I am sorry, you are not a good-hearted person. You are someone who can do something only when you can get something in return. That is not kindness. That is business.
Besides, what others did to you reflects who they are. And who you continue to be reflects the strength of your character.
These stupid influencers have made you believe that you should be kind and loving to those who can give the same energy back to you otherwise just adopt the ‘I don’t care’ attitude.
And look what it did to our generation. Everyone is obsessed with themselves. At every minor inconvenience, people leave each other because ‘you didn’t love me the way I wanted’ or ‘I don’t care.’
We are the generation who have done the least for anyone yet we are the ones who keep preaching not to be kind or you will get used.
I mean, where are we going? What kind of society are we building? What kind of people are we becoming?
The reality is, humans want to be loved, and understood. This is in our nature. Humans are full of love and kindness. And when you go against your nature, you don’t take revenge from the world, you go far away from your true nature. You become someone that your soul wouldn’t approve of so you constantly feel the need to say ‘I am who I am, if they don’t like me, I don’t care.’
No!! In reality, you care too much. You love too much. You are capable of too much kindness. But when you don’t show it, you try to hide your feelings by becoming someone you are not.
If you are also tired of seeing this situation around you and you have been doubting the act of kindness and love, let me tell you,
Love is all that humans are capable of. They say, ‘You come empty hands and you shall go empty hands.’ But I believe, we came with love and we can go with love.
Ask yourself, ‘Why is it that when a good person dies, it becomes so tough to forget them?’
It’s not like the dead gave you thousands of dollars or a beautiful property somewhere in Italy. The only thing we remember about a person after their death is ‘How they made you feel.’ How rich their presence was, how understanding the person was, and how sweet their memories were that the taste of it is still wet on your tongue.
So even though, we came empty-handed, we go with love. We leave love, kindness, words, and memories behind. And even after our deaths, our loved ones miss us despite having everything. What they don’t have is YOU, your love, and your care.
What Kindness Can Do:
When my Instagram account went up, I didn’t know how to sign deals and the process behind it. I messaged multiple people I considered my friend and no one helped.
I then messaged a random person from my field. He made me understand everything in depth. We went into talking and became good friends.
After that, he helped me understand how to set up a PayPal account (I couldn’t do it), he helped me understand how to format a book, how to publish a book — what are the things to pay attention to and he also helped me design the cover of bestselling book — The Art of Being Alone.
Looking back, I now realize I never had the chance to help him as much as he helped me.
So, if we believe the math of this generation, why was he helping me?
He is not some creepy guy who helped me to get to know me or for any other motive. He is a great human being. So that must be it. He is great so he helped. It had nothing to do with what I could do but helping was in his nature so he did it.
I kid you not, if he hadn’t helped me all the times that he did, I wouldn’t have what I have today. I would have been living a very normal life. It was his help that made things easier for me and didn’t make me feel lonely on my journey.
Then, there is another friend of mine who helped me by adding his bank account details to my client’s invoice so I could receive payments. Every month, he receives payment and then sends it to me. He lives in the UK and I needed a UK account.
If he hadn’t helped me, I would have lost over $1500.
But why did he help me?
I couldn’t do anything for him. So why did he help me?
Maybe because kindness has nothing to do with math and exchange offers. Maybe because kindness is all about not being able to see someone else in pain when you have the ability to ease their pain.
Kindness doesn’t mean burning yourself to make the other person feel warmer. It simply means doing what you can to ease someone’s pain or make them happy without being a threat to yourself.
Is that too much to do?
So, if you have been doubting whether you should be kind or not because the world sucks and may take advantage of you, take this article as a sign to be more kind and loving. Because kindness doesn’t go away. It comes back.
If you helped me, maybe I may never be able to help you back, or let’s say I refuse to help you, yet help will come in any other form.
I believe if you help people when you can, God will help you every time.
The Shift In Our Focus:
In the past decade, we are constantly fed that the world is not a good place. Being kind means you are weak and you don’t have boundaries.
As a result, we can see the effect of it all around us. People are becoming cold and rude like the world owes them something.
But look, just look, there is good too. Kind and loving people all around us too. We just have to become ONE and then we shall find little acts of kindness all around us.
For example; Yesterday, I went to get a burger with my brother. I was waiting while he went to order. There was a 4–5-year-old girl sitting with her parents right before me. She was looking at me. So I smiled and she gave me a huge smile back. We got our order packed and while leaving, I waved at her and she waved back.
This little incident is nothing to some but everything to me. It made me feel so loved and touched that I cannot express it in words. Tell me, if this isn’t love, what is?
We have been fed by the entertainment industry that people have to move mountains and pick fights with others for you. But in reality, love comes in quite little ways. If you notice it, you will find it all around you.
How a stranger smiles at you, how kids share their toys with each other, how your friend waits for you while you tie your shoelace, and how your mother cooks your favorite meal.
This is how love and kindness come — in small ways, wrapped in little everyday things that you don’t pay attention to because you are waiting for someone to move mountains for you. The thing is, you expect big things from people who are already doing little acts every day to make your life easier.
If you notice those little acts, you will find love and kindness blossoming all around you — making your life a colorful garden.
Conclusion:
I have been loved and blamed. I have been cared for and ignored. Kindness came into my life when I least expected it and people I loved misunderstood me even after I did everything for them.
I guess what I am trying to say is — you will have all kinds of experiences in life. You will be loved and cared for as well as misunderstood and ignored. But none of it should change the person you are. Don’t let others’ toxicity or hate make you bitter. Become this cute little kind loving human who inspires love.
