Stop Romanticizing Your Life: Do This Instead
You must have watched those YouTube or maybe read those books that encourage you to romanticize your life, haven’t you?
Well, I have. And to be honest, only by watching those videos, I used to fall back into my imaginary world where I am the QUEEN of the world. In fact, just after imagining how it would feel to romanticize my life, I used to feel a different kind of adrenaline rush running through my veins, something that I cannot explain in words.
You might be thinking, Renuka, if you love the concept of romanticizing life then why are you stopping us to believe in it?
Well, after experimenting, learning, watching, and reading about romanticizing life, I came up with this one explanation which is: Everyone is already romanticizing their life. They just don’t know the nature of their character yet.
Let me tell you how you are already walking down on this concept and why this can be the most dangerous thing for your future.
But let’s first understand what romanticizing life really means, shall we?
Romanticizing your life means becoming the main character of your life as if your entire day is being recorded like a movie. In short, you act like you are in a movie playing the role of the main character.
But here is the thing!
Consciously or unconsciously, we all are acting as the movie character behaves. HOW?
In any typical movie, the story starts with a girl and a boy. Either the girl is broken and finds herself in a dark tunnel with depression, stress, and anxiety accompanying her all the time (not to mention a poor girl is seen more often) or the same situation is played by the boy. Then?
Then the boy comes into her life as the HERO who saves her from this cruel world, gives her hope, teaches her how to love, and falls in love with her. Then?
Both of them face this world TOGETHER like God was conspiring from heaven for their paths to collide.
If not the girl, then the boy is broken and then the girl comes as the Goddess to play the exact same role that we have just read. And if there is no love story then there is a friendship story that revolves around the exact same thing. A person broken, depressed, and pathless meets with another person and they become best friends for life.
Most of the movies/web series/books revolve around the exact same plot where one is broken and the other one comes as the guiding Angel which I like to call good drama.
Now, the problem is that people like you and me have been watching/listening/reading about these kinds of life incidents since childhood that subconsciously we have made a belief- one day someone will come to save you, rescue you, or rather fall in love with you. If you want to know whether you have made a belief like this or not then go back in time and tell me how many times have you enjoyed watching such movies and felt even for a millisecond that something like this could happen in your life too?
You don’t need to answer me. Answer yourself. And be very honest because all of us have been there or at least I have been. In fact, all my college life, I was waiting for a friendship like Joey and Chandler but nothing like that ever happened.
So, what’s wrong with this anyway?
Well, your imagination shapes your reality and here you are. Sitting there, thinking how broke you can be and then how a perfect angel-like person will come to save you. The problem with this is that you CHOOSE to believe that YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH to change your life all by yourself. You rely your hope on someone who doesn’t exist. And that’s why, when things don’t fall as per your imagination, and you find yourself all alone with nobody to even ask ‘how are you doing, you feel shattered and devasted and depressed.
This is exactly what I meant when I said everyone is romanticizing their life even if they don’t know and now you know what’s wrong with it.
The question is, WHAT TO DO INSTEAD?
When I said I am in love with the concept of romanticizing my life, I meant I am in love with:
My present moment
And everything that starts and ends with me.
Instead of imagining yourself as the character who needs someone in the first place, imagine yourself as the main character of the movie that is your life. A movie like your life hasn’t been made yet, and a book like your life journey hasn’t been written yet. And that’s why you have the creative freedom in your hands to write as you want, make it as bold and wild as you want, keep it as long as you can, and above all make it about yourself rather than following an old pattern that doesn’t empower you.
Now, I know after reading this, you might also feel the kind of excitement I was talking about but I also know that as soon as you read something even more exciting, you will forget about this. So, let’s do a quick exercise here, shall we?
Exercise to Make Your Life the Most Beautiful Movie Ever:
1. Write Down the Script: I want you to take a diary, and a pen, and write down the script of your life. Write down how you want your life to turn out. Write exactly what are your expectations from this beautiful journey. Don’t make it a formula that must be followed as it is but keep the doors for the magic to happen openly. This step is extremely important as this is the stage when you first time tell yourself what you want, how you want it, and who you want it from.
2. Do One Thing Every Day that Keeps You in the Center: Writing down all these things and feeling good about it is one thing but doing something every single day proves to your brain that you are serious about changing your life is entirely different. It’s up to you what that ONE ACTION can be but it should be significant enough to make a difference. For example, I started exercising and joined Gym to prove to myself that I am dead serious to become the WOMAN I always wished for.
3. Keep a Journal: Whatever you do in a day, write it down in your journal in a way that sounds exciting. The reason behind this is that once you start interpreting normal/boring incidents of your life in a more exciting and exhilarating way, you will automatically start finding your days more beautiful and fun. And after a point, your perception will change and then your routine wouldn’t be happy only in a diary but also in real life.
For now, these three exercises are enough to get started, come out of the pity zone and become the main character. I hope this article helps you in romanticizing your life in the true sense.