Why I Am Leaving Medium Partner Program & Keeping My Articles Free Again

Have you ever loved something or someone so much that just thinking about it made you emotional and your eyes wet?

As I write this article today, my heart is in pieces and my mind in trouble. It might sound a little dramatic but I am a writer, I like to express myself poetically.

And this is where Medium is stopping me.

You might ask ‘How?’

The answer is that I fell in love with the magic of words in 2020 when I read books for the first time.

Then I fell in love with the magic I was able to create through my words when I joined Medium in 2022.

I am not exaggerating when I say, ‘For the first time in my life, I felt like I FIT IN perfectly somewhere’ and this place was Medium obviously.

Since I am from a country where Medium’s Partner Program doesn’t work, I joined Medium just to practice writing and prove to myself that ‘I am working on something at least.’

I was jobless,

Passion-Less (if that’s a word)

My mind was filled with doubts and fear

I was feeling suffocated in my own mind.

But then I joined Medium more than 1.5 years back and after writing for almost 6 months, my articles started receiving so much love that I was forced to believe that I am a good writer. That I can also create MAGIC. That my words have power and can heal people.

If you have been with me since the start, you know that I have always been an under-confident person who never believed that I could do something great. But my Medium audience made me believe otherwise.

In short, I started believing in myself more. I fell in love with writing. And I loved interacting with my readers. It was like a fairytale to me.

Until I joined the Medium Partner Program in January 2023.

After Joining the Medium Partner Program in January 2023:

Once I figured out a way to join the Medium Partner Program, I was able to make MONEY from the same articles I was writing for free.

And who doesn’t like more money? Everyone loves some extra pocket money, don’t they?

However, gradually my focus shifted from ‘being in love with writing’ to ‘being in love with the money that writing was helping me make.’

It was always at the back of my head that my readers wouldn’t be able to read my articles but the sound of money took over and I felt content knowing that I was getting paid for the work I put in.

Things were going well until August 2023.

In August (last month), Medium launched their new updates due to which ‘there is no place for real writers.’

If you are writing articles that the Medium team loves, they will boost it and you will make more money. But if you are writing articles that you love but have nothing to do with ‘productivity, money, or more trending topics like this’, then you will struggle to gain even 100 views on an article that took at least 2 hours to write.

I am not saying that all these writers out there are not good. They are huge and amazing.

But then there are writers like me who don’t want to give tips or tricks on being productive like a rat or 5 Ways to Become a better writer.

And for writers like me, there is no place in the Medium Partner Program.

I write about my personal experiences observations and emotions that I believe are under-rated on the internet. Writers like me who want to talk about the ‘real stuff’ in real language often struggle.

Having said that, for the past month, I have been trying to write articles that can get more views = more money.

The joy I used to feel for writing is dying a slow death. And in a nutshell, before it completely dies, I am leaving the Medium Partner Program altogether.

I don’t want to witness my love for writing converting into my passion for money.

The Shift of Focus:

I used to take excessive pride in saying that I never had to struggle to get ideas to write.

Because I always wrote about things I relate to or have experienced in real life. I never had to watch videos or read articles on ‘what to write to get more views’ because views were never a focus for me.

However, for the past two months, I have been obsessively thinking about ‘what should I write next that people like?’

My head was exploding in the past month. I started seeing other writer’s work to see what is working on the platform to write accordingly.

But all of it led me to overthink and obsess over ‘what to write next?’

And even after thinking too much and stressing too much, when my articles were getting bare minimum of views, I started feeling anxious.

It was like I was thinking and breathing stress.

The love and joy evaporated. I was left with stress and focus on money.

Hence, I am leaving the Partner Program and keeping my articles FREE for everyone. I cannot live another second in stress.

Money is important and to be honest, I am leaving my monthly rent payment by keeping my articles free.

But I cannot live with so much stress. My eyes are moist right now in fact. Not because I am leaving money but because if I look back, I can only find myself miserable.

I want to be one of those writers who is in love with the creation. With the process of writing. I don’t want to write on things I am not passionate about nor can I take so much stress.

I want my life to be joyful so that I can create the same joy for you with my articles. Thus, the decision.

Finally Becoming an Adult:

All my life, I have played safe. I was under-confident for 21 years of my life and I always trusted other’s decisions for me more than my own voice.

If I had to describe myself in one word, I would say ‘confused’ soul.

Because I was never able to make decisions with confidence and trust my choices.

If I had to take one decision, first it would take me forever to land on the decision and then an entire life to trust my decision. Hence, I always trusted on ‘what others have to say.’ I would seek advice from friends and family — asking them to tell me what is good for me.

Today as well, I almost messaged one of my friends to ask him ‘if I should leave or not Medium Partner Program.’

But then I questioned myself, ‘Whose life you are living, Renuka?’

Why should anyone tell you that you have been living under the rock and you can lift that weight and breathe in fresh air? And if that friend says you shouldn’t then are you going to keep living under the stress and make your life toxic?

I am trusting my decision. This may or may not be a smart decision. Leaving money is never smart. But I also want to live happily and stress-free. So, I made my own decision and finally became an adult.

If my decision turns out to be wrong, I will make it right.

As they say,

“You don’t make the right decisions. You take decisions and make them right.”

This is your reminder to ‘TAKE THAT DECISION’ that you have been fearing. Take that decision and bet on the risk. Because you need to start living your life with your own decisions and extreme trust in yourself. Your life depends on you. You depend on you. So, start making your own decisions.

You will never know if your decision is right or wrong and if you were raised like me, you probably don’t believe in yourself either, but taking one decision on your own is your first step towards self-belief.

I took mine and now it’s your turn.

And if yours and my decision turn out to be wrong, we will make it right.

With that, I cannot stop crying because, for the first time in months, I feel connected to writing again.

I leave to this.

A Small Request:

I may leave Medium if the platform continues with this kind of stuff where they don’t have any place for creativity. So, if you would like to join with me, you can join me on Substack. It will be my newsletter. I don’t promise to write often but I do want to take my readers with me.

You can support my work here: Buy me Coffee.

And if you want to read more from me, here is my book — The Art of Being Alone.