Why You Should Reconnect With Your Childhood

Renuka Gavrani
6 min readFeb 8, 2024

Close your eyes, take a trip back, and imagine that little kid who was playing and having fun without worrying about climbing the world, does that child deserve to be ignored?

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Being an adult is difficult, isn’t it? Imagine, this is what we wished for when we were kids. It’s like ‘Please, let me be a carefree child again who comes back home from school to eat without worrying about weight or calories and play as much as the heart desires. Please, let me be a child again. I didn’t sign up for this (adulthood).’

As a kid, I was always jumping from one hobby to another. Though I was not good at studies. In fact, no matter how hard I tried to study, I couldn’t score good grades or do my homework well. My teachers and a few relatives sometimes compared me to my classmates and cousins — reinforcing it in my mind that ‘I suck’ until I accepted it as my reality.

I remember I didn’t care enough to be good at my studies. However, when I saw my mother’s face, I wanted to do it for her — to make her feel proud among my relatives, and also I wanted to prove myself to my teachers that ‘I don’t suck, I can score good grades.’

But again, as I said, no matter how hard I tried to study, things wouldn’t sit in my mind, and even after studying more, I would end up disappointing everyone — especially myself. It was in those moments that I made peace with the fact that maybe, I am not a good student. Maybe I am dumb. Maybe I am less intelligent.

Looking back in time I feel sorry for my little version because my God! She didn’t know she was going to be a best-selling author and her books are going to travel all across the world.

However, even when my life has taken a 360-degree shift, I think there is a part of me that still tries — to do more so I can prove that I am good enough.

It’s way more insignificant now but up until two years ago, I was always jumping from one task to another so I could secure a good future. I believed I had to do MORE because that’s what my childhood reflected.

To do more — even more than more — only then I can achieve something good because ‘I suck.’

When I was in college, my friends used to sit and talk whilst I was alone in my room watching motivational videos and trying to find a way to make it BIG in the world.

I was still in college yet I was scared that maybe I wouldn’t be able to build a secure future.

Now, you must be thinking — Why am I talking about my past when my present moment seems to be so beautiful?

The thing is — I ran so fast in the race of ‘building a good future’ that everything else sort of slipped away from my hands.

And do I dare say I am not alone who lost everything in the race to achieve a good career?

When You Were A Carefree Child:

Remember the time you were a carefree child? I remember it vividly.

When I close my eyes and try to picture my childhood, here is what I see:

Even when I sucked at my studies and I was called ugly and I didn’t have many friends, I was happier. Do you know why?

Because I was lost in my own world. And what does a world of a child is made of?

Hobbies and playing.

I was not good at my studies. Check.

But I was a really good dancer. In fact, there wasn’t a single school event or family function where I didn’t dance and rock the stage.

I was a really good actor or so I like to believe. I always won first prize in school plays and religious drama functions.

My drawing was really good.

I used to do DIY projects a lot — make the best out of crap. I have made tons of things as a child.

So you see, I had a lot of hobbies and I used to play a lot as well — all kinds of games from Barbie dolls to Badminton and anything that anyone wanted to play.

But where is it now?

All of it has vanished into thin air. I was told in school that hobbies don’t help you build a future, studying does. So leave everything behind and just study. In fact, teachers injected a fear deep within our veins that if you don’t pass high school with good grades, your whole life is done and dusted then.

They also said, just score good grades in high school and then your life is set.

But life was never set. After high school, there was senior school then college, and well, then you have a job and bills to pay.

Where does life go after this? I guess, after this, we keep living the same day over and over until we can retire and be children again — read without purpose, take a long walk in the neighborhood, and play with kids.

There is a saying in India that old people are like kids. Perhaps, this is what it means.

Anyway, I believe that why should we wait until we retire to be a child again? Why did we have to run so fast that everything else took a backseat? Why cannot we satisfy the child inside us?

Why cannot we take forward hobbies in adulthood instead of taking forward trauma and people’s judgments?

Think about it for a second.

I took people’s judgments in my future and kept working hard so I could prove that I was good enough.

Then why couldn’t I take my hobbies with me that reflect a happy part of my childhood?

It’s never too late, though, is it?

I have tried to keep in touch with my childhood by enjoying my beloved hobbies instead of holding onto ‘I suck’ moments.

I can go on and on about how much it has helped me to calm down and enjoy my life but that much is understandable.

What you must know is that — by giving space to my childhood hobbies, I have held the door open for that happy girl who knew she wasn’t just about her grades. I have made her feel happier and that is what healing looks like.

Where Is Your Childhood?

If I could ask you to do one thing, I would say, ‘Close your eyes, take a trip back, and imagine that little kid who was playing and having fun without worrying about climbing the world, does that child deserve to be ignored?’

Just because you are working on building a good future doesn’t mean you have to lose everything else. You cannot heal or grow by ignoring the playful spirit of the child inside you. Yes, you may achieve great titles but you will have a tough time finding peace and calmness.

Consider this article as your reminder to reconnect with your childhood by inviting the playful child into your life. Do the things that make you happy. Give space to hobbies that you used to enjoy and build that healthy connection with your childhood.

I have learned in my journey that either you can hold onto the bad parts of your childhood that gave you trauma or you can choose to have a healthier connection with your childhood by holding onto the playful spirit of your heart. The choice remains with you.

Conclusion:

What you focus on grows.

It’s your chance to focus on joy and play so that you can feel more creative and joyful in life. If you don’t feel the same connection with your childhood hobbies, build new ones. Learn new skills without trying to be perfect in it or worrying about monetization.

The baseline is — to do what you desire even if that is far away from the matrix of success.

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Renuka Gavrani

I talk about slow & Intentional living - taking you closer to a happy life. I am a published author of the book 'The Art of Being Alone': https://a.co/d/531JIFq